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I need you, Ava.
I am desperate. For you. For a touch. For a kiss. For the scrape of your hand down my stomach. For the slide of your lips across my hipbone. The sweep of your thigh against mine in the dulcet, drowning darkness. For the warm huff of your breath on my skin and the wet suck of your mouth around me and the building pressure of need reaching release...I am mad with need.
Wild with it.
I cannot have you. I have lost you, as I have lost myself.
And so I go in search. Of myself, and thus the man who might return to you, and take you in his arms.
I loathe each of the thousands of miles between us, but I cannot wish them away, for I hope at the end of my journey I shall find you. Or rather, find myself, and thus…you. Myself, and thus us.
I am taking the long way home, Ava.
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Christian,
I’m losing my mind, and I don’t know how to stop it. I shouldn’t be writing to you, but I am. I’m friendless, loveless, and lifeless. You’re out there somewhere, and still you’re all I really have. I hate my reliance and dependence on you, emotionally and otherwise, and that reliance is something I’m coming to recognize. I hate that I can’t hate you as much as I want to. I hate that I still love you so much.
I hate that there’s no clear solution to our conundrum. Even if we could forgive each other, what then?
I hate you, Christian. I really do.
But most of all, I don’t.
It’s complicated.
Complicatedly (still) yours,
Ava
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My Review
"I need to breathe" is fitting not just for me as I finished this book, but for the characters and their story. It was emotional, beautifully written, totally unique and most assuredly left an impression that I won't forget. The Long Way Home was a different kind of second chance romance and I'm not above begging for more.
Written in letters, emails and journal entries, this story follows a married couple reeling from tragedy.
Ava and Christian were the definition of blissfully in love but as with all marriages, they aren't always easy. And when their love is tested, they each react very differently, setting them on a path neither saw coming. Separated and trying to come to terms with what that means, they reach out through the written word hoping to find who they once were again. Over time they open up and their words, time and distance are the ultimate test.
I read this book in one sitting. I could not put it down. Yes, they spend much of the book apart, but it worked. My heart started racing from the very start and it never slowed until the very, heartbreaking conclusion. And up until that ending, this was 4.5 stars for me even with Christian making decisions that made me rage a little. But yes, I wanted something different at the end. But it is what it is and I was left reeling and honestly still am. I kind of felt a bit like the second chance aspect of the romance wasn't exactly what I wanted. Still. I really enjoyed this story. And I'm hopeful. This series is just starting and I have my fingers and toes crossed that the romance comes back full force in the next installment.
Reviewed by Paige
★★☆ 3.5 "I Need to Breathe" Stars ☆★★
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New York Times, USA Today, Wall Street Journal, and internationally bestselling author Jasinda Wilder is a Michigan native with a penchant for titillating tales about sexy men and strong women. Her bestselling titles include Alpha, Stripped, Wounded, and the #1 Amazon.com and international bestseller Falling into You. You can find her on her farm in northern Michigan with her husband, author Jack Wilder, her six children, and a menagerie of animals.
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